(no subject)

This happens to me almost every Memorial Day. I'll be at a party or barbecue. Making the rounds after I make myself a drink. Eating dogs fresh off the grill and joining in a dance or two if there's something decent coming off the speakers. When - bam - some novice drunk two beers past their bedtime ambushes me and insists on engaging in a conversation that requires a physical proximity normally reserved for an uncertain first kiss.

Last night being no excpeption.

"So, uh, so Jacques tells me you used to be in the military. S'at true?"

"Yep." I shrug and already start scanning for a friendly face in the crowd to use as an escape-excuse. The only time I've ever believed in 'Don't Ask/Don't Tell' is when strangers try getting me to open up on my stint in the service.

"Really, what like in the Marines or somethin'?"

"Navy."

"Oh, well, uh, tha's cool I s'spose..."

"Glad you think so..."

"Naw, naw, bro... it's not like that. Not like that at all. I jes wanted to say, y'know this being Memorial Day and everythin', that I really 'preciate what you did over there."

"Uh-huh..." I don't even want to know where he thinks 'over there' is.

"... and I really think it's a shame, a fuckin' shame, that more people don't like, y'know, respect your sacrifice."

"Well... I dig where you're coming from, man, I really do. But you should know that Memorial Day's for those who lost their lives in service to their country. So, while I appreciate the thought, you should realize I'm not some ghost who appeared at the party in order to help you guys celebrate the end of a three day weekend."

I let him marinate in that for a second and cut him off before he can speak: "I think you're thinking of Veteran's Day, maybe...?"

"Oh, uh... okay. Well happy Veterinarian's Day then, bro" the drunk mumbles awkwardly, slapping me on the back while disengaging from our talk in order to aim his attention on easier distractions and more comfortable company.

Soon I find myself in that 'alone place' all drinkers inevitably arrive at when attending social functions. The heavy drinkers at least. It is an isolated zone of being, that lies in a perilous land some two million miles away from the person standing a few feet from you. A period seperating two distinct life sentences from one another. Becoming a moment that is in no way tethered to your past and does not profer a single omen of the future to come. This is the place where you stand revealed under the trial of your thoughts.

I look into the fire pit burning away in the dirt.

I raised my half filled plastic cup of Jack Daniels Gold and Coke. I toast the ghosts, who though absent in spirit are all around us in influence.

"Here's to you." I nod and look over at the drunk macking on two theatre majors in tight skirts. "Hope it was worth it."