There's no bun in my coven...

Another Sunday afternoon of AD&D and still no one's offered to teach me how to 'really cast spells' yet. What's up with that? I even show up for the game in my black robe and make sure to bring enough goat blood for everyone. But are they grateful for my showing some initiative? Noooo. Instead they're all like - 'Hey, how about you just bring chips next time and what's up with the robe, man? You're freaking out the neighbors.' Oh how I'll make them pay for their insolence when I finally learn the secrets of wielding the power Infernal! Patience though... for now I must bide my time and complete my 'occult training'. So far though my training has consisted mainly of quelling arguments in our party between a halfing rogue and a tiefling warlock. That and making saves. I'm not sure what esoteric lesson I'm supposed to gleam from these exchanges but I'm confident there are dark secrets to be deciphered from them. Perhaps there is a Gematria to my dice rolls. An arcane code being filtered through each save and skill check. Reminder to self to bring a copy of '777' with me to the next game. I won't lie. Though I've made it to my 'paragon path' I'm starting to get discouraged. So far I've tried heavy metal, Ouija boards, bear night at the Eagle and voting Democrat... yet despite all promises to the contrary no one's tried recruiting me into the infamous Satanic Underground for my efforts. Though I did get a lot of phone numbers at the Eagle. Maybe it's time I broke out the heavy artilery and started reading Harry Potter books?

Or maybe, just maybe... if I made my next character an elf? Hmmm....