How I met your mother...

Adventures in Democracy:

One thing I always notice about local elections here in Terminus is the plethora of unopposed candidates 'running' for various city/state government positions. Which is why today, for the first time, I used the write-in vote option. So, while it may be a long shot, I take pride in knowing that I cast my vote for Jack Babalon as Judge of the Court of Appeals. My motto: "If you can't be just, be arbitrary" (from the old William S Burroughs skit). Also take note that I solemnly vow to not let my legislative inexperience get in the way of accepting obscene amounts of lobbyist induced cash (oops... I mean 'free speech tickets' - thanks SCOTUS). Also know that I will bring a much needed Dadaistic imagination to the court. Do you want to see trials settled by lawyers forced to duel with gummy bear stuffed trout's that they use to slap each other with? Then I'm your Judge! Do you want to see a platoon of baboons strung out on PCP be released into the Gold Dome to rampage righteously on your behalf? Then I'm your judge! Do you want to see complicated issues of gerrymandering, campaign financing, and other subjects that make your head hurt be settled by a process involving the I Ching, the Tarot and a dart board? Then baby, I'm your Judge!