Five bucks on a Saturday Night...
Feb. 3rd, 2008 11:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jack_babalonFive dollars don't buy a man much these days: A pack of cigarettes, a Value Meal, a beer, maybe two if the beers shitty enough, halfsies on a dime bag if you go in with a friend ... but if you happen to live here in Terminus City... a fiver buys you a one way ticket to the midnight Puppet Slam at Dad's Garage!
M'man West got a last minute invite to participate in the Slam and since he was right down the block downing expensive Tequila shots over at the Yacht Club he figured he give me a shout to see if I wanted to go along. I did the math: Five bucks, puppets, midnight... i'm in!
It was held in the back of the theater (I think they call it the Top Shelf or some such shit) and though the show was sold out, Mike K told me he had an extra ticket so I didn't have to shlep back home (or sneak in through the back, clever bastard that I am sometimes). I ran into a flock of friends I hadn't seen in awhile - The Lambs, The Oz's, Rotzo the Clown and Zoe Empire (looking like a mod Clara Bow in her fur coat). I bought a beer and perched myself way back in the crowd to soak in the show.
What unfolds next is a barrage of random imagery I still struggle to make sense of: Shadow puppets of sharks having sex to the Love Boat theme (but not before one of them rapes a scuba diver to some Hiffy beats), a performance by the legendary "Puppeteer X" who wore a purple hood with a masking tape "X" brandished over his head so he resembled a Johnny Quest science villain, an alien orc anchor man talking about the self destructive virtues of the recently discovered planet Earth, something that had mice in it, something that involved a man to dress up as a large bunny rabbit, a homocidal rabbit with an egg shaped head teaming up with an out of work police bear to frame another cop of raping a nun while drunk, a one eyed green monster that built itself out of a red furry hand that assembled its face... then outfitted it with a green strap on penis with glowing trip toys for a set of nuts and the piece that stood out to me...
... was a little puppet who was trying to quit smoking as a New Years resolution. To help the little feller quit there was a man who came on stage in a gorilla suit called something like "The Resolution Gorilla" who savagely beat on the little hand puppet when it tried to light one up. Undetered the little puppet tried again and this time when the Resolution Gorilla showed up it was attacked by a large red bird who was something like "The Nagging Withdrawl Bird" who attacked the Gorilla before it managed to get the smoke out of the little fellers mouth. Again the puppet lights up and this time it has the "Only When I'm Drinking Puppy" with him on the stage. When the Gorilla went to make its move on the puppet, the puppy sprayed him with a stream of urine that seemed to mace the poor simian. Finally, the puppet lights up and when the gorilla goes to stop him a man dressed as Adolf Hitler steps on stage bearing a sign around his neck identifing him as "The Who Am I Kidding I am What I am Nazi" and Adolf goose steps on up to the gorilla, whips out a pistol and kneecaps the beast.
But then, as the gorilla crawls away, Adolf follows after it, unbuckling his pants to sodomize the wounded ape. That was Raymond Sexy Raymond if I recall correctly.
Now where else will five dollars buy you Nazi on Gorilla Sodomy I ask you?
That was my Saturday night. Puppet rape and a can of Pabs.
M'man West got a last minute invite to participate in the Slam and since he was right down the block downing expensive Tequila shots over at the Yacht Club he figured he give me a shout to see if I wanted to go along. I did the math: Five bucks, puppets, midnight... i'm in!
It was held in the back of the theater (I think they call it the Top Shelf or some such shit) and though the show was sold out, Mike K told me he had an extra ticket so I didn't have to shlep back home (or sneak in through the back, clever bastard that I am sometimes). I ran into a flock of friends I hadn't seen in awhile - The Lambs, The Oz's, Rotzo the Clown and Zoe Empire (looking like a mod Clara Bow in her fur coat). I bought a beer and perched myself way back in the crowd to soak in the show.
What unfolds next is a barrage of random imagery I still struggle to make sense of: Shadow puppets of sharks having sex to the Love Boat theme (but not before one of them rapes a scuba diver to some Hiffy beats), a performance by the legendary "Puppeteer X" who wore a purple hood with a masking tape "X" brandished over his head so he resembled a Johnny Quest science villain, an alien orc anchor man talking about the self destructive virtues of the recently discovered planet Earth, something that had mice in it, something that involved a man to dress up as a large bunny rabbit, a homocidal rabbit with an egg shaped head teaming up with an out of work police bear to frame another cop of raping a nun while drunk, a one eyed green monster that built itself out of a red furry hand that assembled its face... then outfitted it with a green strap on penis with glowing trip toys for a set of nuts and the piece that stood out to me...
... was a little puppet who was trying to quit smoking as a New Years resolution. To help the little feller quit there was a man who came on stage in a gorilla suit called something like "The Resolution Gorilla" who savagely beat on the little hand puppet when it tried to light one up. Undetered the little puppet tried again and this time when the Resolution Gorilla showed up it was attacked by a large red bird who was something like "The Nagging Withdrawl Bird" who attacked the Gorilla before it managed to get the smoke out of the little fellers mouth. Again the puppet lights up and this time it has the "Only When I'm Drinking Puppy" with him on the stage. When the Gorilla went to make its move on the puppet, the puppy sprayed him with a stream of urine that seemed to mace the poor simian. Finally, the puppet lights up and when the gorilla goes to stop him a man dressed as Adolf Hitler steps on stage bearing a sign around his neck identifing him as "The Who Am I Kidding I am What I am Nazi" and Adolf goose steps on up to the gorilla, whips out a pistol and kneecaps the beast.
But then, as the gorilla crawls away, Adolf follows after it, unbuckling his pants to sodomize the wounded ape. That was Raymond Sexy Raymond if I recall correctly.
Now where else will five dollars buy you Nazi on Gorilla Sodomy I ask you?
That was my Saturday night. Puppet rape and a can of Pabs.