Scenes from my Real Life
Dec. 26th, 2012 05:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jack_babalonWell the kids are filtering back in town and this is how I can tell you're under the age of 25 at my apartment's gym:
1. If you're there an hour, approximately 38 minutes of it will be spent sitting on one of the weight machines texting and scrolling around for the perfect song to 'max out' to.
2. You need the use of both weight benches simultaneously - one to sit on while you stare off mindlessly at the TV mounted on the wall like some creatine fueled cow. The other is for your towel, drink, jacket and phone charger because your possessions are anthropomorphic characters out of a Disney film and require the utmost respect.
3. When you're done with the treadmill you makes sure it's covered in enough sweat to make a porn star blanch and make no attempt at even the cursory wipe down you'd offer a one night stand.
4. You live only two buildings away but still feel the need to drive back and forth to the treadmill to burn off all those calories you're packing on now that you've discovered your first beer.
5. An inability to put free weights back on the rack because showing even the most rudimentary consideration for your fellow man is for pussies, 'the help' and old people.
6. Your words for 'please', 'excuse me' or 'thank you' is the same - a baffled grunt served up with a vacant stare.
1. If you're there an hour, approximately 38 minutes of it will be spent sitting on one of the weight machines texting and scrolling around for the perfect song to 'max out' to.
2. You need the use of both weight benches simultaneously - one to sit on while you stare off mindlessly at the TV mounted on the wall like some creatine fueled cow. The other is for your towel, drink, jacket and phone charger because your possessions are anthropomorphic characters out of a Disney film and require the utmost respect.
3. When you're done with the treadmill you makes sure it's covered in enough sweat to make a porn star blanch and make no attempt at even the cursory wipe down you'd offer a one night stand.
4. You live only two buildings away but still feel the need to drive back and forth to the treadmill to burn off all those calories you're packing on now that you've discovered your first beer.
5. An inability to put free weights back on the rack because showing even the most rudimentary consideration for your fellow man is for pussies, 'the help' and old people.
6. Your words for 'please', 'excuse me' or 'thank you' is the same - a baffled grunt served up with a vacant stare.