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jack_babalonWith all the panicking no one's answering the vital questions, the tough questions, like whether or not Ebola can be contracted through a cheese made from the milk harvested from a working mother's breasts and how much pumpkin flavoring do I need to consume in a day before the terrorists don't win? Since it's not too early for Christmas decorations at the store can I go as a sexy Santa Claus for Halloween? C'mon, you're supposed to be smart right? Then tell me which candidate, while blind-folded, could assemble a semi-automatic assault rifle the quickest and which one can scream the longest into a mirror while naked? While we're on the subject, why can't I vote on the important things any way, like which celebrities should be paired up with which so that their mutant offspring can lead humanity into a new golden age or, failing that, then at least enslave us as we so richly deserve? Also how come I have to wear pants on Casual Friday and why do I have to attend an HR meeting on workplace sensitivity for assuming a pair of Star Wars themed boxers matched with a pair of cowboy boots was as casual as a Friday could get?
Are you even listening to me? Because it doesn't sound like you're listening to me? See, if you were listening, I mean really listening, you wouldn't just be sitting there staring at me like something that crawled out of the wrong end of the glory hole but would find yourself instead rising up to defenestrate every single machine whose screen kept vomiting fear all over you until somebody, anybody, answered the real questions. You hear what I'm saying over here?
Anyway... what I really want to know, Doc is whether or not I'm suitable for sexual relations yet and if so does Obamacare cover Internet Boner Pills?
Are you even listening to me? Because it doesn't sound like you're listening to me? See, if you were listening, I mean really listening, you wouldn't just be sitting there staring at me like something that crawled out of the wrong end of the glory hole but would find yourself instead rising up to defenestrate every single machine whose screen kept vomiting fear all over you until somebody, anybody, answered the real questions. You hear what I'm saying over here?
Anyway... what I really want to know, Doc is whether or not I'm suitable for sexual relations yet and if so does Obamacare cover Internet Boner Pills?