Nov. 4th, 2004

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I'll admit i've been thinking of jail breaking out of the states to the Great White North,I have been long before the events of last night. Like a lot of you I enjoy a certain lifestyle choice, one that isn't merely just looked down upon by the religious right, but is punishable by long stretches of hard time. I won't name it, a fair amount of you know what i'm talking about, if not move on to the next post, nothing to see here, pay no attention to the man behind the LJ. I've been following reports of a policy of general tolerance to my lifestyle in Toronto and their cops (Mounties?)don't really follow through on these things choosing instead to focus on non consensual crimes. Yeah sure I also know all the Michael Moore points about Canada in Farenheit 9/11 and I agree with a lot of them But what it really boils down to is this: Do we really let them have it? The Ugly Americans, the special intrests, the Evangelicals who think so little of their savior they feel it necessary to do his job for him, the badges, the bosses and burecrats that hide behind laws that protect them from justice? I wanna run, but is that why my grandfathers fought in WW2, is that why my mother rioted in Chicago during the 68' DNC- so I could abandon my country the moment God's own corporate elite take the seat? I really don't know and I feel small when I look at the direction we're going as a nation. Images of Xtian think police grabbing me out of the blue like my name was Joseph K, camp concentration open for all creeds and colors, black market sexuality and alley way abortions and we march backwards to a hitech corporate feudal society.
I wanna run. I wanna live somewhere where i'm a man and not a secret criminal lurking amongst the sheep and wolves that police them. I do but I won't.
I'm too stupid to run.
I remember 14 years ago or so, when I was inducted into the Navy, there was apart where you and the other recruits stood up and vowed to defend the Constitution of the United States. Not a political party,not any politican, not to the military, not a God or even the country - no just the Constitution, because rulers and laws come and go but this was the document that held it all together, a blueprint and a promise all at the same time. I was proud of that day, I really
was, and I wonder what happened to that man I share my memories with and sometimes I feel he's not that far away.
I'm not leaving--yet. I do dream of returning to England one distant day and spending the roll of years with the woman I love writting bad prose and sipping my earl gray under the "gray Victorian skies" but thats for when i'm older, and the years have sapped the adventure out of my bones.
I won't run, but man, I need to start hearing some options soon, i'm losing faith and need to hear something besides "If you don't vote don't whine" I'm w/you but when votings not working....
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