I don't know what get's into me

[jack_babalon]

A swarm of hostile nanobots have invaded my body. The little fuckers are swimming around my circulatory system like the itsy - bitsy scientists in "Fantastic Voyage" , only they're intentions are worse. Much worse. I can feel them spray painting along the walls of my arteries, rioting in my lungs screaming "VIVA REVOLUCION!" as the braver ones gang up and ambush my poor little white blood cells- "Hey whitey protect this!". It'll be too late for me soon. I can feel them breaching the last of my defenses and any minute now they'll have taken over the brain.
Of course some people say i'm just being an alarmist and i've merely caught some kind of bug that's going around. They say lots of things- a lack of sleep since I got back from vacation, the radical shift in air quality i've just experienced, bad nerves from reemerging into the work force again, that the Moon is in the third house and at midnight all the agents meet. Well the last two were true but the rest of that sounds like mumbo-jumbo to me. But of course I realize that it's not I who am sick..no...hahahaha....not me. It's the nano's see... tiny, wittle robots swimming around me with laser beams and mechanical kung fu grips ripping apart my insides on a submolecular level, terraforming my body into a walking, breathing command hive from which they will stage further invasions from... or they could be terraforming me into a very nice series of luxury townhouses complete with a lovely view, pool, tennis courts and of course as you know it's location, location, location baby. Ahhh I wish I could afford to live inside me.

Well at least I'm home today. So as I sniffle, cough and sneeze my way into becoming a zombie host to my nanochildre*(!@><945ASD#$70ugjok@#$%&^U WE ARE NOW INSIDE THE NERVOUS SYSTEM OF DESIGNATE HOST JACK BABALON PLEASE IGNORE THIS POST THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR FROM THE NANOARMADA WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS WE LOVE YOU WE MERELY WANT TO CONVERT YOUR ORGANS INTO STARBUCKS AND GAPS WE WILL MAKE BROTHELS OF YOUR GENITIALA RENT OUT YOUR MEMORIES AT BLOCKBUSTERS AND FILL YOUR INTESTINAL TRACK WITH FAST FOOD RESTERAUNTS REMEMBER WE LOVE YOU REMEMBER WE LOVE YOU REMEMBER WE LOVE YOU

Comments

[scottopic.livejournal.com]

fuckers. thank god I put HEPA FILTERS ON MY EYES.

[raygunn-revival.livejournal.com]

But their love is so small, it's hardly a consolation. Even if they all love you in the same fashion, and in concert, it barely adds up to what we'd consider tolerance, let alone love.

Oh, and veto their plans to make a juke joint of your liver. That's going too far.

I hope you survive the invasion.

[rubberella.livejournal.com]

i hope you feel better...damn aliens and zombies, they don't know who the hell they are messing with...

[(Anonymous)]

And for this I breast-fed you? (in appropriate Hollywood-take on a Brookyn accent)

Ahhh ... more lies my own mother told me. Nanobots should have fled screaming from the now-suitably-aged mother's milk still lining your artieries as your personal goddess-shield.