Apocalypse (S)now
Jan. 9th, 2011 09:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jack_babalon"... coming up next on ATL23 Impulse News: The National Weather Service predicts a 57% chance of Frost Giants storming through the Metro Area by morning, see how it'll effect your commute. Plus, reports of carniverous Snow Angels attacking downtown residents. Will your family be next? But first we go to Bob, who has some bad news for Eagles fans."
"Thanks Mary, as we can see, Aaron Rodgers simply dominated the field with three touchdown passes to lead the Packers to a 21 - 16 victory over Michael Vick and the Eagles. Which is bad news for Eagles fans... but really bad news for Vick, who, as you know, will now be sacrificed to a pack of ravenous wolves in order to appease, and I quote the press release from the office of Governor Sonny Perdue, 'the Angry Sky Gods who Make Cold fall on Georgia.'"
"Not a good end for the seaon for Vick, is it, Bob?"
"No, Mary, I should say not. But then I for one hope the Angry Sky Gods will be pleased with Vick's thoroughly mauled corpse and perhaps take pity on the rest of us, so we won't be forced to devour our young while waiting for the long, harsh winter to thaw."
"We can only hope, Bob... we can only hope. Now, Dan Butler with the Accu-Storm Tracker. What have you got for us, Dan?"
"Wellll, as you can see Mary, with an estimated snow fall in North Georgia expected to reach several inches, the Social Contract has been called off in the Greater metro area, along with surrounding Gwinnett, Lynch, Shoeless and White Hood Counties. Mob rule is in effect in these areas and residents are strongly encouraged to live as beasts amongst their neighbors until only the strong survive."
"Good advice as always, Dan. Alright, next... is that ominous shape hovering outside your window a carniverous Snow Angel or just an angry Frost Giant? Stay tuned when ATL23 Impulse News returns."
"Thanks Mary, as we can see, Aaron Rodgers simply dominated the field with three touchdown passes to lead the Packers to a 21 - 16 victory over Michael Vick and the Eagles. Which is bad news for Eagles fans... but really bad news for Vick, who, as you know, will now be sacrificed to a pack of ravenous wolves in order to appease, and I quote the press release from the office of Governor Sonny Perdue, 'the Angry Sky Gods who Make Cold fall on Georgia.'"
"Not a good end for the seaon for Vick, is it, Bob?"
"No, Mary, I should say not. But then I for one hope the Angry Sky Gods will be pleased with Vick's thoroughly mauled corpse and perhaps take pity on the rest of us, so we won't be forced to devour our young while waiting for the long, harsh winter to thaw."
"We can only hope, Bob... we can only hope. Now, Dan Butler with the Accu-Storm Tracker. What have you got for us, Dan?"
"Wellll, as you can see Mary, with an estimated snow fall in North Georgia expected to reach several inches, the Social Contract has been called off in the Greater metro area, along with surrounding Gwinnett, Lynch, Shoeless and White Hood Counties. Mob rule is in effect in these areas and residents are strongly encouraged to live as beasts amongst their neighbors until only the strong survive."
"Good advice as always, Dan. Alright, next... is that ominous shape hovering outside your window a carniverous Snow Angel or just an angry Frost Giant? Stay tuned when ATL23 Impulse News returns."